How Do You Know When You’re A Geek?

Image credit WP Clipart
Image credit WP Clipart

So you hear more people calling themselves geeks lately. That kid who used to get laughed at and bullied for having more brains than brawn is suddenly becoming the go-to person for Geek Culture 101. Computer smarts are becoming more essential in the real world, which can bring out the geek in all but the blondest of us.

You do have to know where to draw the line. There is no such thing as a fashion geek. Fashion is such a moving target that geeks know when they’re better off sticking with the basic T-shirt (preferably not red to avoid becoming a target for phasers) and geek glasses (the more quadrangle-shaped the better). How do you know when you’re a geek?


  • You can use physics to prove you didn’t run a stop sign. Dmitri Krioukov scored some major geek points and walked away from a $400 traffic ticket by writing a paper called “The Proof of Innocence”, in which he used comparisons of angular and linear momentum along with a lot of math to prove that it only looked like he didn’t stop to a police officer who was viewing him from an angle. However, he later admitted that he left a flaw in his work based on the Toyota Yaris he was driving for other geeks to find. True story from Yahoo News.
  • You’ve memorized the lyrics for the “Enterprise” theme song. Okay, if you can carry a tune in a bucket, you need to try out for “American Idol”. That doesn’t stop you from singing along. “It’s been a long road…”
  • You recognize Legos as being an art medium. Building sculptures out of Legos requires enough math and engineering skills to qualify Lego artists as geeks. You’ve grown beyond following the instructions in the themed sets and you can build a life-sized Jedi Master Yoda. One of these days, the Lego geeks of the world are going to combine all their Legos and create a life-sized Golden Gate Bridge.
  • You own a 3D printer. You’ve heard that NASA recently bought one to print out rocket parts and you wonder what took them so long. Any time somebody needs a new accessory for a doll house, a mini-sculpture of Poseidon, or a replacement part for that robot you created for them a couple months ago, they can call you and you’d be more than happy to sell them one for the right price.
  • You know Android is where it’s at. You wouldn’t touch an iDevice with a ten-foot pole. Google Play is your source for movies, music and miscellaneous entertainment though you still occasionally call it the Android Market. You’ve programmed at least one Android app and uploaded it in the hopes of making some cash.
  • You’re a member of at least one freelancing site. The 8-to-5 world wasn’t so kind to you, but your happiness quotient went up when you discovered that people will actually pay you to perform those one-off jobs that they don’t have the in-house staff for. That means anything from writing a bundle of articles to programming a business app that potential customers can download. Hey, it definitely beats collecting unemployment checks.
  • You’re pretty quiet except when your interests come up in the conversation. You’re not exactly the life of the party, but you won’t miss a chance to educate others about the intricacies of “Doctor Who” or at least tell a funny story about the Mercury astronauts. You might have quit being offended when people lose interest but you wouldn’t mind getting together with a couple of other geeks to sketch out blueprints for a warp drive on a spare piece of paper.

Bonus geek points if you recognize the guy in this video.

Been a while since a video last cracked me up. Who says (astro)geeks can’t hold a beat?

If you find yourself nodding your head to more than two of these, you could well be geek material. Go ahead and give yourself a pat on your back. In this modern world, geeks should learn that they are the ones in control. If somebody gives you a hard time for having no social skills, they might suddenly find themselves without technical support or, worse, a “Creeper” virus crawling around on their computer screens. That’s right. Don’t get mad, just get geeky. Geeks rule!

Tools For Geeks

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